A friend of a friend came up with these sports quotes.

Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role model: “I wan’ all dem kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I wan’ all the kids to copulate me.

New Orleans Saint running back George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season: “I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards which ever comes first.”

Upon hearing Joe Jacobi of the ‘Skin’s say: I’d run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl.”

Matt Millen of the Raiders said: “To win, I’d run over Joe’s Mom, too.”

Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins: “He treat us like men. He let us wear earrings.”

Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann: “Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.”

Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburg: “I’m going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.” (Now that is beautiful).

Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach: “You guys line up alphabetically by height.”

And, “you guys pair up in groups of three and then line up in a circle.”

Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson going to prison: “Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to prison for three years, not Princeton.”

Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he keeps a color photo of himself above his locker. “That’s so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still find my clothes.”

Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president on a former player. “Son what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?”

“Coach, I don’t know and I don’t care.”

Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regimen of heavyweight Andrew Golota: “He’s a guy who gets up at six o’clock in the morning,regardless of what time it is.”

Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M, recounting what he told a player who received four F’s and one D: “Son, looks to me like you’re spending too much time on one subject.”

In the words of NC State great Charles Shackleford: “I can to go my left or right, I’m amphibious.”

Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared so nervous at practice: “My sister is having a baby and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or an aunt.”

Former Houston Oilers coach Bum Phillips when asked by Bob Costas why he takes his wife on all the road trips: “Because she’s too ugly to kiss good-bye.”

USC Coach John McKay, after the Trojans’ 52-0 loss to Notre Dame in 1966: “All those who need showers, take them now.”

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